What Do You DO When the World's Gone Mad?

It’s crazy. CRAZY. Here in the United States the last couple months have brought devastating hurricanes that effected millions and the deadliest mass shooting in our history.

Whether you were directly affected or not, you know lives have been forever changed. Whether you were directly affected or not, one of those lives might be yours.

So what do we do?

What do we do with the sadness, grief, fear and anger? We each process our emotions in our own way, get professional help when needed and make a choice. Will these events change me for the better or the worst? Or will I pretend they don’t affect me at all?

I know what I choose.

I’ve sat with my feelings, tapped into my heart and continue to process the events in supportive environments. And I’ve decided three things.

I’ll LEARN about my brothers and sisters in pain and how I can help, both before and after disaster hits. I want to be more open to the cries of others and be aware when someone maybe reaching for help and understand what to do. I’ll learn how to better connect to my inner divine so I can more easily take inspired action when my ego wants to react from fear, distrust and anger.

I’ll LIVE my life, engage with others and do my best not to let fear guide me. I’ll be smart about my decisions and more self-aware of the times I can be more fully present to the wonders of daily life.

I choose to live my life from a foundation of LOVE. The love that has the courage to see the divine in all situations, seeks to serve and forgives when my ego doesn’t want to.

I don’t think this will be easy. But I know that I’m drawn to LEARN, LIVE and LOVE my way through the chaos I see around me.

What are you drawn to? Ask your inner divine for the answers that are right for you.

All my love,
Diane

10 Tips to My 18 Year Old Graduate Self

May is the time for graduations. From preschool to grad school, my Facebook feed is full of photos showing beaming graduates of every age and the tearful families who love them.

I’m a sucker for graduations. The pageantry, the ritual, the joy of new possibilities…I just love it. Even if it’s only a TV commercial, I start to tear up when I hear “Pomp and Circumstances.” Every. Single. Time.

I got to thinking about my own high school graduation in 1975 and what I’d tell myself at that age if I had the chance. At 18 I wasn’t ready for a lot of hard truths, but here’s 10 tips that would have made the next 40+ years easier:

1) Do what scares you. Meet new friends, have adventures. Take more risks. And when that sweet girl in your dorm freshman year asks you to go with her and a few friends to hear her cousin play in a new band, GO! Her cousin turns out to be Clarence Clemons and you could have met Bruce Springsteen and the rest of the E Street Band. Studying for that stupid history test only got you a B anyway.  

2) Listen to the wisdom of your inner voice. Balance “what makes sense” in your head with what your heart tells you is true. You’ll have several situations where you went directly against what you knew in your heart was the best choice…and you’ll regret it. Mom was right. Listen to your intuition. Like when you felt pulled to go to the hospital to see your friend “D” but didn’t want to intrude. Go. Turns out you don’t get another chance.

3) It sucks, but Mom was right about a lot of things. Just accept it. You’ll understand more when you have your own kids.

4) Dad was right too, especially about money. Put some away every month. The years do go by faster than you think and you’ll wish the money you spent “investing” in your 8-Track, Pet Rock and Beanie Baby collections had been sitting in a bank benefiting from years of compound interest. 

5) Always tell people what they mean to you, how much you love them. Never hold a grudge. Forgive freely. Holding on to hurt never helps. Love yourself and forgive yourself for everything. You finally figure out all your “mistakes” were opportunities to grow. Trust me, you end up with TONS of growth opportunities.

6) Turns out meditation isn’t just for weirdos and hippies. It becomes your foundation in a decade or two and changes your life in miraculous ways. Don’t fight it.

7) Calm down. Just calm the hell down. What you think is a big deal, usually isn’t and the really scary stuff you never see coming. Learn to be more present in each moment and you’ll do far better than worrying about a thousand possible situations in the future.

8) Stop worrying so much about your weight and hair. Get more exercise and trust hair products will be invented that will tame that curly mane (it takes a few decades though). You’ll finally learn you are not your looks. The sooner you figure this out, the better life becomes. Oh, and when you hear about this thing called a “Brow Bar” run, do not walk, to the closest one as fast as you can. (I know I just told you you’re not your looks, but it doesn’t hurt to be well groomed.)

9) Every second of every day is precious. Do your best to not waste a minute. 

10) You were absolutely right about one thing. Elton John IS still rocking well into his 70’s! And he still sounds amazing. 

The Cowgirl Ballerina Teacher Nurse Me

Yep, that’s me. Diane Lynn Haworth, daughter of Stan and Mildred (aka “Pete”) Haworth, of Warrenton, Virginia around age four and a half. At this young age, I remember being very confident and feeling I had my life all figured out.

I knew exactly what I wanted and was well on the way to becoming a cowgirl ballerina teacher nurse. That was my plan. I would obviously marry a prince, live in a castle and have many babies.

And live happily ever after….

I’m so glad I didn’t know what life would really bring. At this tender age I hadn’t yet begun to doubt my direction or come under the paralyzing self judgement of adolescence. I was still a happy spirit, freely exploring the world.

So glad I didn’t know then that:

• my childhood would be rocked by my parent’s constant health issues which plagued them the rest of their lives
• I’d face many challenging years as a working mom when a record number of  women started to change the face of the American workforce
• it would take three tries to find my prince…and I never lived in a castle
• I’d be plagued by fertility issues and weight problems throughout my life
• I’d experience years of abuse, fear, loneliness and overwhelm

I’m glad I didn’t know all that then. I understand now that a crucial part of our life is the way we learn to navigate the boulders on our path. The truths we discover about ourselves and our world are the treasures of a life lived through challenge. We constantly face hurdles and either keep creating the same obstacles throughout life, or find a way around, through or over them.

I’m also glad I didn’t know that:

• my kids would be my biggest joy in life and that every day with them as children, and now as adults, presents me with new opportunities for ever deepening love and happiness
• that the pain in my marriages ultimately gave me the biggest opportunity for deep, soul growth and I’m genuinely grateful for the men who were my teachers
• dealing with my parents’ ongoing health issues led to critical life lessons in patience, compassion and surrender
• accepting my body and the aging process is a rewarding journey when the gifts of the experience are embraced
• the work I love to do, spiritual life coaching, didn’t even exist when I was a kid
• love really is the answer to every life problem

I’m glad I didn’t know the twists and turns my life would take. My experiences are often clouded by what I expect to be “easy” or “hard,” “good” or “bad” ones. Not knowing allows reactions to be more real, the lessons can be learned at a deeper level and genuine joy can be even more expansive.

Now at age 60, I feel more like that little four and a half year old girl than I ever have. With my eyes and heart wide open, I believe I can do anything. Not because I don’t understand how life works, but because I do…or I’m at least starting to.

There’s time to be a cowgirl ballerina teacher nurse if I want to…I’m open to the surprises yet to come.

A Time of Rebirth

Spring has always been special for me. 

My beloved dogwood trees are blooming here in Virginia, the forest has begun to show her vibrant spring colors and the robins have started to appear after their winter vacation. I love spring. New beginnings. Rebirth. Physical, emotional and spiritual rebirth.

That’s what’s happening for me now.

I’m exploring yoga, working on a new high-performance coaching certification (which I’ll be offering later this year) and delving even deeper into my study of A Course in Miracles.

It’s always been easier for me to start a new path then to finish it. Commitment hasn’t always led to easy follow through. I procrastinate. Postpone. Find lots of distractions. Part of the high-performance techniques I’ve learned have helped me tremendously which is why I want to share them with others. 

I feel a new chapter starting for me and my family this spring… it’s exciting, scary and exhilarating all at the same time.

I feel a renewed passion for life which I attribute to three things. After several years, I feel the trauma of my dad’s passing is now behind me. While I miss him, the grief has shifted and I feel a level of healing I’ve not experienced before. My new grandson, Emory, has opened my heart in ways I couldn’t have imagined and I feel a deep need to contribute in new ways to help create a more loving world for him to grow up in. And I have a birthday coming up this week.

A big one.

It ends in a zero.

I used to think sixty was “getting up there.” Time to rock grandbabies, bake pies, spout wisdom…and wait for the end. What a difference a few decades make! My perceptions of aging started to change when a good friend gave me the book “You Can Heal Your Life” by Louise Hay. 

WOW!

Here was a woman who had faced overwhelming challenges and triumphed over each. Her life could easily be a blockbuster Lifetime movie! She’s become a living example for me in so many ways. While she had a fascinating life particularly in her forties and fifties, she did something extraordinary after that.

What did Louise do at sixty? Started Hay House which is now recognized as one of the leading new thought, self-development publishers on the planet. Some of my greatest insights, understandings and personal growth came from books, events and connections I’ve made thanks to Hay House. 

But Miss Louise didn’t stop there.

In the following decades, she took up organic gardening, painting and sculpture, ballroom dancing and continued to publish her own books, classes and programs. And for over twenty years continued to travel around the world appearing to thousands of delighted fans in numerous live events each year.

Now over ninety, she continues to inspire all who know her and her work.

Amazing.

Incredible.

And if Louise can do it, so can I.

So can you. So can anyone committed to growth and intending to have fun along the journey.

Here’s to spring. Our rebirth as individuals and in community. To us all beginning a new chapter, continuing to grow and to finding ways to love deeper and laugh more!

Thanks, Louise…

Courage...

I was speaking with my coach this week about courage. Courage in business, courage in relationships and courage in life in general. She asked me "how do you define courage?" 

I answered quickly "It's taking the action you know to be true, from your soul level, even in the face of fear." I was surprised how easily the definition came. But I knew it was true. I know that any time I've taken a courageous action; it was fueled by divine inspiration. I just KNEW it was the right thing to do. I knew it from such a deep level, there was no question. That didn't mean I always followed through, though.

Often I realized the action I was considering would "rock the boat" in the situation I was thinking about. So sometimes I'd chicken out...I wouldn't do what I knew to be true. And I always suffered for it in some way. 

Sometimes however, even in the face of what I thought might be dangerous consequences for me personally, I followed my heart and took the inspired action. It didn't always work out immediately the way I anticipated. Often the results were far more beneficial than I could ever have imagined. And sometimes it took years to see the truth of the situation I had faced and why I was called to a specific action. One thing has always been clear.

Whenever I follow my heart, my true inner divine knowing, and take the inspired action I feel called to carry out, I feel congruent with Spirit. I feel at peace. Instead of feeling stuck or like a victim, I am in motion and am in the flow of the solution. 

Yep, I've had to learn the hard way, but I learned. Being courageous enough to take inspired action always leads me to relief, deep peace and joy. 

Having courage in life has helped me enjoy less panic and more peace. And that’s one of my goals for this year. I suggest you try it as well.   #LessPanicMorePeace

A Look Back and Ahead...

So how was your 2016? Did you experience a few surprises? Maybe a shock or two? Most of the world did.

Although some great things probably happened as well, many times as a result of life's turmoil’s we find strength, courage and resolve we didn't know we had.

And let's be honest...most of us would prefer to live "happily ever after" without those pesky life problems. I know I would. But I've learned through the struggles we have the chance to find even deeper wells of love within us. (Just because it's true, doesn't mean it's pleasant.)

The biggest lesson I learned last year?

Situations will constantly evolve, people will come and go and sometimes life isn't fair. However, you can always choose to react to life's challenges with love and respect. And when you forget that, forgive.... and choose again. 

Although we had happy additions to our family this year (my first grandchild is due in February and we welcomed a wonderful new brother-in-law in March), much of our country, and the world, is feeling unsettled. Uneasy. Fearful. Unsure.

That's why most of this year I'll be sharing ways for you to experience "Less Panic, More Peace." We'll be looking at techniques to help you bring consciousness to life's chaos in a way that taps into your most loving and compassionate self. We can all do that. And we'll do it together. Until then, remember #LessPanicMorePeace.